Farm Wife · My Farmer · Thankful

I’m a Farm Wife with No Garden

YUP, you read that right.  Before I get too deep into blogiverse, I figure I’d better set things straight… I’m a farmwife with no garden… either I’m a failure or I have the sense to know that this farmwife of today can’t do it all!

Perhaps this shocks or disappoints you?  Or maybe it gets you curious… and has you thinking that one doesn’t necessarily need to have a garden, know how to drive a tractor or have daily “chores” to be a farmwife.

The garden that was here in the backyard when we bought our farm 13+ years ago. I have failed this farmwife tradition miserably!

Here is what I’m not:

  • Although I have driven a tractor, truck, combine and even ran a sickle mower… I have NO clue what I’m doing, and my Farmer is CRAZY to even consider letting me do so.  Seriously… I can barely back my van out of the garage without hitting something… and he thinks I can operate farm equipment?!  Um ya, NO!
  • I’m not like any of my amazing farmwife neighbours that are out milking cows, making bales, harvesting grain… and everything else in between.  Rather… I’m in my cozy farmhouse doing custom web design and development for my FABULOUS customers.  I will however venture outside to give my Farmer a helping hand when he needs it… although he knows it’s not always an easy task getting me out there… especially on cold Manitoba winter days!  Ya, I guess you could say I’m a bit of a princess… a farmwife princess that is.
  • If my dear Grandmothers were still with me, perhaps they’d be disappointed in this farmwife.  I don’t come remotely close to being as good a farmwife as they were.  I grew up watching and seeing my Grandma B. prepare all the meals, do all the gardening, tend to the chickens, mend all the clothes, do laundry the hard way (hand wash and clothes line)… the list goes on!  Perhaps this blog is my way of sharing my farmwife stories with them… if they were still with me today, the stories that I’ll be sharing here in my blog, are the stories I’d be telling them.  I know deep down my stories wouldn’t disappoint them… rather they’d likely put a smile on their face and they’d be happy for their granddaughter who has been able to find “her place” on the farm as a farmwife of today.

And here is what I am:

  • I am a farmwife that completely supports my Farmer with all of his farm business decisions… thankfully I married a man that I completely trust, because farming decisions are just too risky and scary for me!
  • I’m really good at holding gates and making friends with the cows and calves while doing so. I think cow licks are cute, and I welcome them at all times! 😉
  • I’ll hop on a tractor if I’m really needed… and I’ve even once operated the combine… however, I should NOT be doing this!
  • I’ll help pull a baby calf when the extra hands are needed, and feel blessed to witness the miracle of birth so many times each year!
  • I take supper out to the fields during harvest time, and I love it!  Tailgate dinners, the smell of grain dust and a dirty, hard-workin’ farmer are just a few of this farmwifes favourite things!
  • My “tractor” is my computer, and my Farmer respects, understands and fully supports this. Although I braved working off the farm for 14+ years, and did the hellish commute to downtown Winnipeg 5 days/week… I am super blessed to now being operating F3 Designs out of our cozy farm home (since January 2007)… offering custom web design & development, web content management system (F3 CMS) and eMail marketing (F3 Reach) to many wonderful clients.  I guess you could call me a geek farmwife… but go ahead, I wear my geekness with pride and LOVE what I do for a living!
My Farmer… photo taken sometime between 1993-1997 when we were dating. Taking this photo was one of millions of moments that I knew I just had to be this man’s farmwife some day! 🙂

What I Know For Sure

I’m learning what it means to be a farmwife every day. Although I’m not your typical farmwife, there are a few things this farmwife of today knows for sure:

  • Hay is green and straw is yellow. Cows eat hay and they sleep on straw. Yes there is a difference.
  • A cow is an ‘experienced’ female, a heifer is a female with no babies yet, a calf is a baby, a steer is a male with no “jewels”… and a bull is a male that makes babies… and I think he’s an unfaithful pig.
  • Baby calves can and do come in the house, but help me Lord if my Farmer ever brings in a cow.
  • Farmers don’t do yard work… well at least not my Farmer.  But he will fix my lawn-mower when I tell him to… cuz he knows I mean business when it comes to my lawn!
  • Being married to a Farmer is similar to being married to a truck driver… during seeding, harvest and calving there are times where I forget what my Farmer looks like… and long for him to come home.
  • Pig and chicken poop smells way more horrible than cow poop. I picked my cattle Farmer wisely.
  • Farm neighbours will do anything to help you out, they are FANTASTIC… what’s even more fantastic about them though is that they can’t see into your house. My closest neighbour is a mile down the road, and yes I like it that way.
  • Not all farmwives wear aprons… this one spends most of her days in PJ’s at her computer.
  • For farmwives that work off the farm (I braved it myself for 14+ years)… you will NEVER come home to a clean house. You may leave your house in the morning clean, but that Farmer man you married will never keep it clean while you’re away.
  • When your Farmer asks you to come help chase cows, make sure you put on a bra.
  • Your cooking doesn’t taste crappy because you can’t cook, it’s because your Farmer typically eats it 2-6 hours after you made it.
  • You will NOT survive your marriage on the farm if you don’t have a mudroom.  We did the first 14 years of our marriage without one… and I like to think what didn’t kill us made us stronger.  We now have a mudroom, and our farm is a much happier place!
  • Nothing sounds better than the sound of prairie silence. It’s perfect and I am blessed to have it every day.

Do You Wanna Come See My Cows?

19+ years ago, a handsome young Farmer took me out on our first date. When he brought me back home… as I was about to get out of his truck (yes he picked me up in his dirty farm truck), he said to me “Hey… do you wanna come see my cows?”  For the first time in my life, I thought… cow shit, flies and big bulls sounded VERY appealing… and quickly responded  “I would LOVE to come see your cows!”  So back into the farm truck I got, and off we went to see Bryan’s cows.  They were the cutest cows I’d ever seen… and from that moment on I knew that one day I’d be his farmwife.

Our 5 years of dating was filled with late night combine rides, hauling cattle to the stockyards, watching baby calves come into this world, shovelling out calving pens, dusty grain truck rides… and MUCH more that I considered to be the ideal “dates”.

Just a few days ago, my Farmer and I celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary. Have those 15 years turned me into a rockstar farmwife?  Heck no… I suck at it actually… but what I do know is that I wouldn’t trade any of this for nothin’!  I love my hard workin’ farmer, the sound of sweet prairie silence, the smell of cow poop (you get used to it after a while), the fortunate blessing to be able to raise our children on a farm… and a Farmer that supports this farmwife of today.  He knows my computer is “my tractor”, that I don’t have a garden, and that I can’t drive standard… but he loves me more than I ever thought I could be loved. He is perfect, and he is MY Farmer! 🙂

The day I became a farmwife (November 22, 1997). The day I married the sweetest and most perfect man on earth… my Farmer. 🙂

8 thoughts on “I’m a Farm Wife with No Garden

  1. Hey Faye,

    My dad re-married a few years ago, and my step mother is the daughter of two farmers. They passed away long ago, but I still remember how early she used to get up to go and work on the farm to help them.

    Your article brought back some awesome memories. Thank you!

    1. Glad to hear it brought back some good memories for you Cendrine! While writing it this morning, it also brought back many special memories for me! I just know I’m going to find MUCH enjoyment out of blogging… and I’m so excited to finally get Today’s Farmwife going! This farmwife’s mason jar has been overflowing with ideas… now to get them down and out there is the fun part! 🙂

  2. Such a great post Faye! I’ve actually helped deliver a calf too…a few times. I graduated from Red River College with my Animal Health Technology diploma so I’ve witness some amazing animal/farm related events. We’ll have to swap stories some time 😉

  3. You are just an amazing person Faye Fossay, you never cease to amaze me and you still inspire me everytime i read anything you write.

    1. AWE!!!!!!! Thx Brig! And every time I hear from you I get sad because I wish I could see you WAY more than I do… it’s not nearly enough! Always missing u and ur incredible sense of humour! xoxo

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